Episode 10: Get Off the Block

Travel isn’t just about vacations, bucket lists, or taking pretty pictures. Sometimes the biggest thing travel gives you is perspective.

In this episode, I talk about how leaving your normal environment can change the way you see work, money, culture, and even what you believe is possible for your life. Experiencing different systems, different paces of living, and different social norms makes it clear that the way we do things at home isn’t the only way to live.

From tipping culture to work culture to the overall pace of life, getting outside of your usual surroundings forces you to question assumptions you didn’t even realize you had.

You don’t have to travel constantly, but sometimes you do need to leave your block long enough to remember that the world is bigger than what you see every day.

Travel isn’t just luxury.
It’s perspective.

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Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Hey y'all, hey, welcome back to the podcast. And today, I'm not gonna hold your hand when I say this, but it's time for some of y'all to get off the block. I know. Like, uh oh. Because of my tone. Like, well, what you mean now? And what do I mean when I say it's time to get off the block? And here's the thing. If you know me well, you already know, like, of course you would say that. Of course you would say that. Okay. And um this this episode is not sponsored, but if you're watching on YouTube, um I'm gonna show y'all my new bracelet that I got. Um I I call it like the Pandora for travel girlies, but I'll show you here as best as I can. Um, but you collect the charms, their flags um of all the places that you've been. And I can't actually fit all the places I've been on mine. I think I'm up to 17 countries, but I do have about 10 or 11 on my bracelet. So I know I'll get I'll get some people like, of course, you would say that. But it's not about luxury or collecting experiences. When I say um it's time to get off the block, it's because travel really uh enhances your perspective. And what I'm noticing in this time that we're living in, in this child, this space that we're living in is too many people lack varying perspectives, are not open to understanding that um there's more than one way to skin a cat. That people do things differently and different does not mean wrong. You know what I'm saying? And I think, you know, in general, but also for me, that travel has absolutely um opened my mind and opened my world, no pun intended, um, so that I don't have a limited perspective about things, and I don't think that the way I do things is the only right way to do things, or the way I was um raised is the only way that people could, you know, do things and things like that. And that happens because you open your world to see that there's um there's billions of humans on the planet and they're doing things in different ways and they're thriving and surviving and um and they have these beautiful lives that you can take something from and that you can um use to enhance the way that you live. And so when I see leave your block, it's like, man, get out of your neighborhood, get out of your city, and also get out of your country if you have the means and desire um to do that, put yourself in position to start uh making those small changes. I mean, I know a lot of people who literally grew up in big cities and they haven't even left their side of town. You know, I was born and raised in Chicago, and I know a lot of people who never left the south side. I know people who turn up their nose at the west side or vice versa. Um, they've never been off the south side or they've never been to the north side. You know what I'm saying? It's like that's insane. You will remain believing these false beliefs that um you you and your people, so to speak, um are the only experts in life and know how to do certain things or live certain ways, and then you'll become defensive or even offensive about the way other people live their lives. And I think that is such a disservice um to yourself and to certainly to other people, because there's absolutely more than one way to structure um a quality life. You know, one way to think about it for me is like exposure changes your assumptions about things, your assumptions about um people and your assumptions about ways of living, and it certainly removes fear about a lot of things. Um for example, I think on a let's say a less um urgent scale, I would say tipping culture, I think that is something that was super interesting to me when I left the United States. Um, particularly uh in Asia and Europe, they tend to pay their uh employees fairly. So since they tend to pay their employees fairly, tipping culture is not the same. It's based around what we all perceive that it should be based around, which is gratitude and exceptional service and things like that. So then when I give something to somebody, one, they don't feel entitled to it to it, but two, they're very appreciative of what I gave and it's like a two-way appreciation. But that is a cultural difference and it shifts the relationship and the pressure that you feel, and it doesn't make this like this this uncomfortable feeling at the end of like a service. Um and I think if you've only been around your country and you've only had service in America, whether it be um getting your hair done or your nails done or eating at a restaurant or um staying at a hotel or something like that, or you know, sitting at a bar, you everybody understands that sense of pressure. I mean, some people like to be super performative about it and pretend like it makes a ton of sense to be tipping 25 and 30 percent on their bill all the time. But nobody would probably feel that way if it wasn't the pressure because we know that these people are vastly underpaid. And if you did tip people like that, it would truly show a sense of gratitude, um, because they showed like exceptional service, and it would really also give those people their flowers because it shows like who's really doing an amazing job, and not just that we're all just doing it because of the sense of um expectation. And then I will say um on a slightly more um impactful level uh in terms of exposure, I, you know, heard a lot about that when you go to Asia as a black person, that you will get a lot of maybe attention or stares or people asking to touch you or take pictures with you because they don't see a lot of black people. And I will say that um I've been to Asia twice. I've been to K Seoul, uh, Korea, and I've been to um Bali, Indonesia. And in Indonesia, I guess because they're kind of brown, it was I didn't really feel any type of way. But certainly, yeah, it's interesting. When I was in South Korea, they definitely were looking at us quite a lot and um definitely asked to take pictures with us. Um they were very respectful, but I think because a lot of times they've never seen a black person and they don't know what to believe other than what maybe has been told in propaganda on TV or news or um that maybe even by the American media uh or other people's media, then they didn't realize like what it's like to encounter a black person and that we're just normal human beings. So like think about that in the vice versa sense. Like, what cultures have you not been exposed to and you have preconceived notions about? So travel forces us into situations where we should allow ourselves a sense of openness so that we can learn and grow and um remain open-minded. And another huge thing I noticed in travel is like the differences in pace of life. Um and that can happen city to city for sure, because like small towns versus big cities, urban versus suburban, you know, country, that kind of thing. But certainly, like I said, internationally. Um everybody is not um enamored by hustle culture. That is distinctly American, um, it's distinctly capitalistic, that we put so much pride into the fact that we work a lot and we um get burnt out and we hang our hats on um working more than a 40-hour work week and that kind of thing. And we think productivity means everything and it dominates, you know, your sense of self-worth and your higher ability. And there's so many cultures who do not believe in that. They they prioritize health or family time or just you having your own balance and doing whatever you want to do with your life, where or they believe that work and productivity are a means to a greater end in terms of what you want to do with the rest of your life. And I think you can maybe just love to work, and that's your business, but it unless you expose yourself to other people's pace, you won't um really know for sure because you've just been dragging yourself along, accepting the way we do things here in the States as um, you know, as an an unar inarguable truth. You know what I'm saying? So I think it's really important to reconsider that kind of thing. And um, you know, I kind of think of it like a lot of people have traveled at least to like the Caribbean. So a lot of people have been to Jamaica or Puerto Rico or um the Bahamas. And that island life, or like when they say like, you know, uh no problem or everything's iry in Jamaica, they mean that, child. You know, I've been there, especially Jamaica, a lot of times. Um, and not just on like a cruise ship or at a you know all-inclusive. I've been there just chilling, you know, and um they run on a very different pace of life. And when you're used to everything being quick, quick, quick, you're used to, you know, even the person in the checkout line at the grocery store moving fast, you're just like, what's taking so long? But it's because they don't prioritize doing everything with like this unending sense of urgency. And that's not necessarily right or wrong, but we have to give ourselves an opportunity to expand beyond the one thing that we know. Like I said, get off the block. Um I mean, I know for me, I've had that feeling even as a young girl when I was like 17 or 18. I just always knew, even without means yet, that um I was gonna be somebody who got off the block. I wanted to know more and see more and do more. And I was gonna prioritize trying to figure out how to make that happen for myself. And then also I would say that everything, it's not like a huge, like systematic shift or change. Small systems in your life matter too, probably sometimes more than the big stuff, because it's kind of like it's the little things, you know, type thing. Because like for me, there's this like little thing that hit me when I was in Europe, and I think that they do it in Canada too, is this like idea around like transparency versus hidden costs. And and I know America does a lot of things because like everything's controlled by the states, and like the federal government only covers like certain things here. Um, but they have what they call like VAT and VAT tax. And the way they do it is basically like it's it's tax, like how we have blah, blah, blah plus tax. But for them, it's when you see a price, the the tax is already like always included. And that seems like a small thing, like who cares? But like, first of all, I mean, I do math for a living. But some a lot of people hate math. And I just found it to be like one of those things that was like super like relieving, and I didn't realize it was a stress because, you know, we just shop, right? Especially because now we don't even use paper money anymore, like I grew up using, you know, in the 90s and 2000s, and like coins and stuff. But like having to always think of something when you see the price as in that's the price I see, but that's not the price I pay. And it's gonna be that plus tax. And then wherever you are, whether you're traveling or you're at home, or you went to a different city or you're buying something online, you gotta figure out like what the taxi is in that place because it's not a universal tax. That is always like so obnoxious, right? But it's not that we all just accept. We don't even think too much about it. I mean, it's obnoxious, but we don't think there's anything we could do about it. So we just all go with the flow. And I had Euros, and you know, I've been doing like all the conversions and just trying to figure out, and I was trying to use up all my Euros before I left. And at one point I was thinking to myself, like, okay, but then I gotta think about tax. So I have enough for all the stuff that I have in my little basket, but what about tax? And it was like, girl, we don't do that. It's like we don't do that here. But the price you see on the tag is the price. Like, we have already done the math and it includes the tax. And if you have enough money for what it says, then you have enough money. And I'm like, huh. And it's like you just don't even realize sometimes like tiny little aggravations and like causes of stress that we carry that we don't even know we're carrying. And um, and how like systems um can take, it can choose to like create friction for you or ease for you by removing certain things off the table. Like that's math that you don't have to do when you're shopping for your groceries or you know, buying school clothes for your children or you know, whatever the case may be. Just being able to be like, hey, I got 20 bucks. How far is my $20 gonna go? Not, oh shoot, no, I really need to put something back because really I only go I can only have $18 worth of stuff. Because when they add the tax, then I won't have enough. So that was just one of those small things, but I think when you see alternatives in the way people live, I think it can open up your mind about like, wow, those are things that I didn't even realize could be different. I didn't even realize that we could that other people are being creative or um systematic in the way that um life can be. And like I said, I think it's one of those things that like once your imagination expands or your awareness expands, you can't reshrink it. It's like when people say like you can't unsee something. And that's how it is. It's like I think that's the true benefit of getting off the block, right? Like getting outside, seeing something outside of the norm. And I think that can go in a lot of different ways. If you're a young person, consider going away to college. And that doesn't have that could be out of state, that can be just somewhere that's, you know, a few hours away from your city that you grew up in, um, studying abroad, taking a job out of state when it's offered. Like it doesn't always have to be, you know, well, I don't have money and I can't just hop and go, you know, on a trip all the time. It doesn't always have to be that. We can leverage our resources in a way that puts us in position to experience something that is um is different than what we've always known. And the thing is, the world is so big. That's I think that's my big thing. Like the world is so big. I don't think it was designed for us to stay in one place the whole time. And that doesn't mean you have to go move and live somewhere for a long time, but it could. And for me, certainly, I hope to live um somewhere different, you know, than I live now. And I certainly don't live where I grew up, you know, in Chicago right now. So I think you just give ourselves the opportunity to explore and see where we can thrive and where we can enjoy and where things are done differently and where can feel the most good um to our bodies, you know, and to our minds. I mean, some people hate the cold and their body hates the cold, their bones hurt. Girl, take yourself somewhere warm. You know what I'm saying? Like some people got asthma, but you've been living in the south with all that pollen. Take yourself to somewhere, you know, in the mountains with thinner air or something like that, you know, whatever. Like, really, I think just be open-minded to um leaving your zip code. It matters for sure. It challenges your assumptions, um, it exposes you to new ideas, and it reminds you that your reality is not the only one that exists, and that your current life can always change if you want it to, and you for, you know, in the ways that that you want it uh to change it to. Like you don't have to always look at life from the outside looking in. You don't have to snow globe life. You don't have to, you know, treat it like an aquarium where you're like, oh man, I wish I could be in there. You know what I'm saying? Like, no, really treat the world as your playground and try, you know, I don't care. Try to travel once every year and a half, you know. Try to take opportunities to where somebody else will pay for, like study abroad, or um, or when your job is offering to send somebody somewhere, hey, take it. What's the worst that can happen? If you don't like it, go home. You know what I'm saying? Because, like I said, living your whole life with such a limited perspective and thinking there's only one way to do things, and um, that is so myopic. And I think that's what how we end up in these situations where we have people and groups and politics and paradigms that seem so off the wall because they don't take into account the diversity of people, the diversity of ideas, the diversity of perspectives and needs, because we've stayed on the block mentally, we've stayed on the block emotionally, we've stayed on the block educationally, we've stayed on the block physically. And it it's your job to expose yourself to more than you know where you come from. Like you don't have to stay planted where you were born. You may bloom somewhere completely different than where you were planted. Um, and you should give yourself that opportunity. And even if you find that home, your original home is where you are the most comfortable and the most excited and the most um uh just at home in general. Like that's cool. But at least you now have seen things differently. You've met other people, you understand other perspectives, you have an appreciation. Hopefully, you learn something that you can bring back to your experience that makes it better and more easeful. And that's important as well. I mean, none of us have a monopoly on creativity or ideas or you know, anything. Like inventions have happened all over the world. Creativity happens all over the world, art happens all over the world, um, medicine, science, technology happens all over the world. Like nobody has a monopoly on it. So if you don't even get out, like you're really cheating yourself because there's so much happening everywhere. Like, I mean, I don't know if y'all on the side of like um China TikTok child, but like, have y'all seen their tech? Like, have y'all seen their tech? Like their phones look crazy futuristic, their cars crazy futuristic. Um, I'm and I like tech things, but it's just like all kind of stuff like that, like, you know, healthcare. Obviously, I study health, um, the innovations that happen, and you know, in terms of like health and longevity, chronic disease, cancer research. Like, imagine if we weren't prone to sharing our ideas across the world. And you can and if we weren't open to receiving those ideas, where you you're from more than likely didn't come up with all the things that we all benefit from to this day. So I think it's just really important to um remain incredibly open-minded and to not just be open-minded in terms of receiving, but go out there and get it. Like go out there and immerse yourself. Learn about the fun things, learn about different foods and cultures and people, and then make a judgment. Don't just let people tell you what certain people are like, what certain cultures are like, what certain languages are like, what certain religions are like, what certain climates are like, what neighborhoods are like. Like, why are you in here living your life off of secondhand knowledge? Like, get out there, find out for yourself. You know what I'm saying? Like, get out there and and and live for real. Because just sitting around listening to somebody else's perspective, it's like playing a game of telephone with your life. Like, who wants that? And I and I want to reiterate again, and I'm I'm jingling my little bracelet again for those who is at the top of the episode and who aren't watching, you know, who are listening on audio only. I promise you, I know I'm not the one that normally has the credibility to say, like, you should get out there and travel because it's easy, because I obviously am somebody who prioritizes travel, but I want to say um that travel is not just luxury. Travel is perspective. And way before I could afford luxury travel, I was traveling, I mean, be for just curiosity. I was traveling because I would watch um the Food Network or Travel Channel and um shows like Parts Unknown and things like that that made me want to see other parts of the world and see how people live. And I was super curious um about the way people do things and other spaces. And honestly, like I would I used to start traveling by like doing road trips, like way before I could even afford a Southwest flight, honey. And this was because this was before, you know, the low-cost carriers be f became cute, honey, before they was, you know, it was easy to hop on a frontier or a spirit. And all the girls had was Southwest. And I couldn't even afford that. So we were road tripping, trying to get somewhere in the car. Okay. Here come that gas money, maybe a rental car if you if you're nasty. So it's not all about money. It's not, it's not about that. It's just like it it comes from a desire to see and do life differently, and then you'll start prioritizing it and making it happen for yourself. And yes, now me. Many, many years later, two decades into travel, yes, your girl, it's jingle lingling. Right? And it and I've expanded beyond where a road trip can take me and you know, just going away to school. But it has to start somewhere. And that those small spaces just in the next city over or the next date over or going away to school starts this perspective shift and it starts showing you something different. And I'm so proud of, you know, the people who I know, the young people who I know who go away and they learn and they expose themselves. And um that's just definitely the way it goes. And like I said, this video is not sponsored, but the company is what is the company called? It's called Exchange Life. So I mean it can be sponsored if y'all wanna, if y'all want to talk to a sister. But it's not. It's just that um this is just really, you know, a keepsake that reminds me of how far I've come too and like how many times I've taken the time to to get out there and learn something different. Because every place on on this list was not somewhere that I necessarily thought I was gonna like or um or was even an easy trip, if if that makes sense. Some of these was more like a pilgrimage journey. Some of them got stories. Um but yeah, like it's just important. It's not just, you know, it's not just about Instagram photos. That part is fun. You know, we like to show off where we've gone and where we've been, but it's really about what you bring home that that materially changes who you are. So, I mean, that's pretty much all I got for y'all for today. I just really wanted to share, to share that because I think it's uh it can be a huge misconception for those who see people like myself who travel a lot, that like it's like some big luxury thing, and really it's about so much more than that. Um and then something I wanted to show y'all, because I feel like I always have books here uh when I'm doing the recording the episodes, because and they're always referencing the topic that we're talking about, but I don't always specifically show them um on camera. So um this one, I'll just show this one in particular. It's called um 50 Places to Travel Solo. And that's because I do most of my travel solo. And again, it's only if you're watching on video. Um sorry to my audio folks. But yeah, uh, and then also I told y'all on last episode that I do have a text line and it's in the show notes or the show description, something depending on what platform you're listening on. And y'all can text and offer any comments or ask any questions that you would like me to answer uh in the episodes, and I'll get to them as I can. Um and what else, child? That was something else I was supposed to tell y'all. Oh, and so please rate the uh the podcast. I think you can I don't know if you can do the ex the individual episodes or is it just the podcast as a whole? But I know different podcast platforms do it differently, but certainly please rate on Spotify or wherever you're listening at, girl, Apple Podcasts, etc. And if you're watching on YouTube, hey hey. And uh go ahead and hit the subscribe button and the thumbs up and all the things. And I appreciate y'all. I um this is episode, I think, 10. Um, so we we're doing it. We out here. And I'll see y'all next time. Later.